Some Days My Brain Gets Stuck

What is it with Thursdays that it is difficult to write anything down? I mean, this week isn’t much different than last week. Sales are dismal, I’ve been trying to keep busy and try different things, but I have not seen any changes. I know it takes time, I’m just running out of that. They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing expecting a different result. I say it is doing different things to get a different result and the different result never occurs.

So, I sit here in front of the computer, spinning back and forth on my chair just trying to figure out what to say today. I’ve been for a walk to get the mail. It’s all the way at the other end of this retail complex so, it’s a nice walk. There is also a little spot closer to the mailboxes where you have a solid curb so I can practice my balance. Yes, every time I go get the mail, I walk on the curb as if it is a balance beam. As we get older, it’s very important to try and maintain your balance. Thus, if you are around, you will see a 59 year old woman pretending to walk a balance beam EVERY time she gets the mail. I’m over it.

Now, back to the matter at hand, what in the heck to talk about that does not send me down the dark rabbit hole of despair. Yes, this is a continuing metaphor. Also, I’m over it.

THE LIGHTBULB JUST WENT OFF! Luckily, it was just on a dimmer switch. I just had to turn up the light. Anyway, I wanted to talk briefly about how I think that this endless depression over the store not doing well is, perhaps, spilling over in my interactions with people. It’s been a tough two years of interacting with people who are nice to your face, but you never see them more than once. You do start to wonder what is going on out there. Was I too nice? Do people in Savannah not know what to do with a white woman who is actually nice and just wants to help? I have absolutely no idea and I think I might be becoming more jaded, more sarcastic, more guarded, just more…

This could, inadvertently, turn those few people who do walk through the door away. That would definitely send me down that rabbit hole. What to do about this? I’m not sure. This is a time when the person who is always wanting to help others, needs help. I seriously just need to figure out what the missing puzzle piece is that will get more people to walk through the door. Spending soooo much time with myself is just not healthy.

We all need people in our lives, but, as an empath, it is even more important. Empaths work off the energy of others and if there are no others, an empath is left alone and wilting. I think that Thursdays are my day to show that I am wilting. I have been doing things over the weekend, getting fed and watered by being around people. Then, the week begins and we start where we left off. If nothing changes, and it hasn’t so far, I start wilting because I have no one (this is another rabbit hole of despair moment).  We’ve got wilting empaths and dark rabbit holes, not sure what other metaphors I’m gonna come up with. I definitely need some more positive metaphors.

Anyway, that’s my Thursday thoughts, for what they’re worth. Hope your Thursday is going better. Remember to water your fellow empaths and be careful around rabbit holes.

Until next time,

                Have a Healthy Day!!



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